After a rocky start with my blood tests (with the CBC not working out that I mentioned earlier), the lab that actually performed all the blood and urine tests took longer than expected. Results finally came back yesterday, and I heard from Eileen that I'll be getting the medical clearance to go forward, as there was nothing strange in any of the results.
Nothing strange to her at least. It's very disturbing when you have a belief, and you've held that belief most of your life, to be told that you wrong, that you weren't who you believed yourself to be. My whole life (since about the 4th grade), I've thought that my blood type was B+. This didn't seem strange at all to me, since that's my mom's blood type, and my dad's blood type is O+. In the fourth grade we tested our own blood with these do it yourself kits, and I was pretty sure my blood type came out to B+. So imagine my surprise yesterday when Eileen came back and told me that my blood type is O+. I guess back in the fourth grade, somehow the do it yourself kit messed up.
A belief I've held for almost 30 years, just turned upside down! LH had a good laugh over this yesterday. But the good news is all the results looked fine, and we're pretty much sure we can go forward.
Eileen also mentioned that we're going to target October 15 for egg retrieval and October 18 for the transfer. We're definitely rolling now!
Friday, August 27, 2004
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
More paperwork, more calls, but we're closer!
I got a call yesterday from Kim, the psychiatrist we're working with at Growing Generations. Only I didn't know it was here, I didn't hear her correctly when she identified herself, so I spent this phone conversation wondering who the heck I was talking to. It wasn't until near the end of the phone conversation, that I asked her who was on the phone. I then had to apologize, and I realized I must seemed extremely stand-offish during the whole call where she was asking how the meeting with PB and her husband went.
We got more paperwork including the retainer agreement with Fertility Futures, the egg donor agreement, and additional paperwork from CA Fertility Partners. More to read and more to sign.
I also got a bill from CA Fertility Partners for the phone consultation with Dr. Ringler. It also sunk in for the first time that all these medical costs are going to have to paid out of my own pocket, since my Kaiser coverage won't cover anything out of Kaiser!
I got a call from Erica this morning asking about scheduling and if I had spoken with the nurse over at CA Fertility Partners and the scheduling for my Europe trip.
I called her back and confirmed that I had and asked her for a status on the blood work I had done. But apparently the paperwork still hasn't come back yet, so we're still waiting on that one.
Kim did mention to me that I could contact PB and let her know how we're doing, so I'm going to try and send her and her husband an e-mail either today or tomorrow.
We got more paperwork including the retainer agreement with Fertility Futures, the egg donor agreement, and additional paperwork from CA Fertility Partners. More to read and more to sign.
I also got a bill from CA Fertility Partners for the phone consultation with Dr. Ringler. It also sunk in for the first time that all these medical costs are going to have to paid out of my own pocket, since my Kaiser coverage won't cover anything out of Kaiser!
I got a call from Erica this morning asking about scheduling and if I had spoken with the nurse over at CA Fertility Partners and the scheduling for my Europe trip.
I called her back and confirmed that I had and asked her for a status on the blood work I had done. But apparently the paperwork still hasn't come back yet, so we're still waiting on that one.
Kim did mention to me that I could contact PB and let her know how we're doing, so I'm going to try and send her and her husband an e-mail either today or tomorrow.
Friday, August 20, 2004
Trip planning
My work is going to require that I be in Europe in late October. As it turns out this seems likely to be right around the transfer date (when the embryo will get transplanted into the surrogate). So I spent yesterday on the phone between Erica, Emily and Anita to try and get a better idea on dates, so I could better gauge when I should take my European trip.
Looks like I'm going to start my trip around the 23rd of October and push into November, since we're going to see if the transfer can be scheduled earlier in October.
It's all tentative of couse, so it may all still change on me.
In other news, the money for the trust fund that's going to pay for all this needs to be funded by August 26th, so I sent off a check to Growing Generations today. A mighty big check too.
Looks like I'm going to start my trip around the 23rd of October and push into November, since we're going to see if the transfer can be scheduled earlier in October.
It's all tentative of couse, so it may all still change on me.
In other news, the money for the trust fund that's going to pay for all this needs to be funded by August 26th, so I sent off a check to Growing Generations today. A mighty big check too.
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Little steps back and more paperwork
I got a phone call yesterday from Eileen who is the nurse assigned to us from CA Fertility Partners. Apparently the blood sample they took from me on Friday didn't make it to the lab in time, so they couldn't do a good CBC and diff. They've asked me to find a local lab and have the blood test done again and faxed to them.
Last night I found a local lab, and today went there during my lunch break to have my blood draw. None of this of course is covered by my insurance, so I'll have to see what the cost of this is going to be. I'm going to be billed directly for this latest blood draw.
In addition LH and I sat down last night and went over the legal agreement sent to me by Will Halm's office for the surrogacy agreement, and also went over the consent forms that CA Fertility Partners gave me to review.
The surrogacy agreement looked pretty standard, so we agreed to okay it, but the consent forms are going to take a little more study. There are some heavy duty decisions we have to make as part of the consent forms. These decisions include disposition of any left over fertilized embryos. What's the right decision. I'm not sure, but we're going to have to decide soon.
Last night I found a local lab, and today went there during my lunch break to have my blood draw. None of this of course is covered by my insurance, so I'll have to see what the cost of this is going to be. I'm going to be billed directly for this latest blood draw.
In addition LH and I sat down last night and went over the legal agreement sent to me by Will Halm's office for the surrogacy agreement, and also went over the consent forms that CA Fertility Partners gave me to review.
The surrogacy agreement looked pretty standard, so we agreed to okay it, but the consent forms are going to take a little more study. There are some heavy duty decisions we have to make as part of the consent forms. These decisions include disposition of any left over fertilized embryos. What's the right decision. I'm not sure, but we're going to have to decide soon.
Monday, August 16, 2004
The LA Trip
Wow. It's Monday, the weekend's now over, and it seems like so much has happened in such a short span of time.
After we arrived in LA, we spent Thursday evening at the Grove, a combination of theaters, stores, restaurants and farmer's market. It was a nice evening at leisure in preparation for the next day's meeting.
Early on Friday we got up and drove over to the offices of Growing Generations. We were greeted by Gail, who we sat down with and chatted about PB, and the process for the day, and answered some questions for us.
We also met with Teo M., who runs operations, and he went through the cost breakdowns of the process, as well as when and how payments are due, including which pieces were available for payment via credit card (in case we wanted to earn miles when possible).
We got to meet Erica face to face and learned some interesting facts about her, including the fact that she was also an egg donor previously for the program.
During our meeting with Erica we found out that PB and her husband were going to be late to the match meeting because they had been rear-ended in their car on their way to the office. Not an auspicious start for the match meeting. It was Friday the 13th after all.
So prior to meeting with PB and her husband, we also sat down with Kim B., the staff psycologist at Growing Generations, who wanted to address any concerns and questions we had. She had met both PB, the surrogate mother, and BR, the egg donor, and thought they were both good matches for us.
When we finally got to meet PB and her husband it was obvious they were both still a little frazzled by the car accident, but Gail let us in the discussion of introducing ourselves to each other. She facilitated the meeting for about half an hour or so, and then sent us on our way to a restaurant for our lunch meeting, unchaperoned.
PB and her husband were extremely friendly, easy to get along with and made the meeting very easy for LH and myself. We presented them with a Chinese Yi-Xing teapot we had picked up last year in China, as a welcome gift, and it seemed well received.
The parting words from Gail before we left the Growing Generations office was for us to call her before noon on Monday, to let her know if we wanted to go ahead with the surrogate, and for PB to let us know if they wanted to go ahead with us, the Intended Parents.
It turns out I learned from Gail later that PB and her husband called her that afternoon after lunch and tol her that they wanted to go ahead with us as Intended Parents! LH and I discussed and had already decided Friday as well, but I didn't call Gail until Monday the 16th around 9 am to let her know our acceptance.
Later, Friday afternoon, I had my appointment at California Fertility Partners to do my testing, which inlcuded a blood draw and urine sample. They were going to do a toxicology work up, CBC, hepatitis B and C, HIV, among other tests. Anita, the nurse at CA Fertility Partners informed us that we did not need to leave another sperm deposit as the one from April was sufficient (we had been told earlier to expect to leave another sample). The results of the sperm tests showed a lower than average concentration, lower motility than average - 39%, but a larger than average volume, which made up for the lower concentration.
We spent the day Saturday in Hollywood visiting my sister and her family who were doin in LA for the day as well. We flew back into San Jose Saturday evening, and got to spend Sunday back at home. LH and I talked for a while on and off through out the weekend about PB, about in-vitro fertilization, about Growing Generations and the whole process.
On Monday, I called Gail, as I mentioned earlier and got the good news that PB and her husband wanted to go forward with us. Around 12:30pm I had a phone consult with Dr. Ringler from CA Fertilty Partners, since he was unavailable during our Friday visit. He walked through the procedures, and timelines during my call.
So now we wait for the test results, we wait for BR, the egg donor to be screened (she's the long pole, as her tests take 3 weeks to complete), and then we can go forward!
At least at this point in our journey, if feels like we're moving ahead, and quite quickly!
After we arrived in LA, we spent Thursday evening at the Grove, a combination of theaters, stores, restaurants and farmer's market. It was a nice evening at leisure in preparation for the next day's meeting.
Early on Friday we got up and drove over to the offices of Growing Generations. We were greeted by Gail, who we sat down with and chatted about PB, and the process for the day, and answered some questions for us.
We also met with Teo M., who runs operations, and he went through the cost breakdowns of the process, as well as when and how payments are due, including which pieces were available for payment via credit card (in case we wanted to earn miles when possible).
We got to meet Erica face to face and learned some interesting facts about her, including the fact that she was also an egg donor previously for the program.
During our meeting with Erica we found out that PB and her husband were going to be late to the match meeting because they had been rear-ended in their car on their way to the office. Not an auspicious start for the match meeting. It was Friday the 13th after all.
So prior to meeting with PB and her husband, we also sat down with Kim B., the staff psycologist at Growing Generations, who wanted to address any concerns and questions we had. She had met both PB, the surrogate mother, and BR, the egg donor, and thought they were both good matches for us.
When we finally got to meet PB and her husband it was obvious they were both still a little frazzled by the car accident, but Gail let us in the discussion of introducing ourselves to each other. She facilitated the meeting for about half an hour or so, and then sent us on our way to a restaurant for our lunch meeting, unchaperoned.
PB and her husband were extremely friendly, easy to get along with and made the meeting very easy for LH and myself. We presented them with a Chinese Yi-Xing teapot we had picked up last year in China, as a welcome gift, and it seemed well received.
The parting words from Gail before we left the Growing Generations office was for us to call her before noon on Monday, to let her know if we wanted to go ahead with the surrogate, and for PB to let us know if they wanted to go ahead with us, the Intended Parents.
It turns out I learned from Gail later that PB and her husband called her that afternoon after lunch and tol her that they wanted to go ahead with us as Intended Parents! LH and I discussed and had already decided Friday as well, but I didn't call Gail until Monday the 16th around 9 am to let her know our acceptance.
Later, Friday afternoon, I had my appointment at California Fertility Partners to do my testing, which inlcuded a blood draw and urine sample. They were going to do a toxicology work up, CBC, hepatitis B and C, HIV, among other tests. Anita, the nurse at CA Fertility Partners informed us that we did not need to leave another sperm deposit as the one from April was sufficient (we had been told earlier to expect to leave another sample). The results of the sperm tests showed a lower than average concentration, lower motility than average - 39%, but a larger than average volume, which made up for the lower concentration.
We spent the day Saturday in Hollywood visiting my sister and her family who were doin in LA for the day as well. We flew back into San Jose Saturday evening, and got to spend Sunday back at home. LH and I talked for a while on and off through out the weekend about PB, about in-vitro fertilization, about Growing Generations and the whole process.
On Monday, I called Gail, as I mentioned earlier and got the good news that PB and her husband wanted to go forward with us. Around 12:30pm I had a phone consult with Dr. Ringler from CA Fertilty Partners, since he was unavailable during our Friday visit. He walked through the procedures, and timelines during my call.
So now we wait for the test results, we wait for BR, the egg donor to be screened (she's the long pole, as her tests take 3 weeks to complete), and then we can go forward!
At least at this point in our journey, if feels like we're moving ahead, and quite quickly!
Thursday, August 12, 2004
In Los Angeles
LH and I flew to Los Angeles today in preparation for out meeting with the surrogate mother, PB, and her husband tomorrow.
In addition to the match meeting, we've also got a meeting with Stuart, the CEO of Operations at Growing Generations, a meeting with the Insurance agent, and a meeting at the fertility clinic, so that I can have some blood tests run as well as another genetic deposit.
We also got the donor agreement from Will Halm's office today to review, before it goes on to BR, the selected egg donor.
We spent the flight down from San Jose going back over both PB's profile and BR's profile. The excietment just grows in anticipation of tomorrow's match meeting!
In addition to the match meeting, we've also got a meeting with Stuart, the CEO of Operations at Growing Generations, a meeting with the Insurance agent, and a meeting at the fertility clinic, so that I can have some blood tests run as well as another genetic deposit.
We also got the donor agreement from Will Halm's office today to review, before it goes on to BR, the selected egg donor.
We spent the flight down from San Jose going back over both PB's profile and BR's profile. The excietment just grows in anticipation of tomorrow's match meeting!
Tuesday, August 10, 2004
Email and more Forms
Yesterday I received an E-mail from Will Halm's legal offices. Will is one of the co-founders of Growing Generations. It contained copies of the retainer agreement and waivers of conflict of interest notices. There's a possible conflict of interest since Will represents us and Growing Generations, as well as Fertility Futures.
We signed the forms and faxed them back today. I'm sure there's lots more paperwork to go!
We signed the forms and faxed them back today. I'm sure there's lots more paperwork to go!
Monday, August 09, 2004
A Little Bit of Disappointment
We had been warned by Emily at Fertility Futures that if we had found an egg donor profile we particularly liked, we should let her know immediately to prevent someone else from choosing her. There's a lot of competition in this industry apparently, and we found that out this weekend. Two of the five egg donors we were looking at were taken this past Friday. These two were our top two choices as well. So we started the search from the beginning again, and to our surprise we found a young lady we both really liked.
BR is caucasian, with a mixed European background. She has a large percentage of Italian heritage. She's fairly intelligent, and has very beautiful look to her, which LH calls a little bit on the exotic side. She has a little bit of everything in her background.
I called Emily this morning, and told her BR was our first choice, and she's going to contact BR to get her black out dates (the dates she's unavailable for injections/harvesting), and get her started on appointments for psychological and genetic screening.
So there was a little bit of disappointment this weekend, but it all works out in the end!
BR is caucasian, with a mixed European background. She has a large percentage of Italian heritage. She's fairly intelligent, and has very beautiful look to her, which LH calls a little bit on the exotic side. She has a little bit of everything in her background.
I called Emily this morning, and told her BR was our first choice, and she's going to contact BR to get her black out dates (the dates she's unavailable for injections/harvesting), and get her started on appointments for psychological and genetic screening.
So there was a little bit of disappointment this weekend, but it all works out in the end!
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
More calls from Growing Generations
Yesterday, I got another call from Growing Generations, this one from Teo, who called to ask us to select a lawyer to represent us through the process. Will Halm, who is the co-founder of Growing Generations, represents about 99% of the clients of Growing Generations. Why buck a trend that's been successful? So I chose Will Halm as well.
I'm going to have sign a retainer and mail it back to them, and they're going to take the money for the retainer out of the trust account we've already set up with them with our initial retainer for Growing Generations.
I also got a call from Monica at Fertility Futures who was calling on behalf of Emily to see if we had any questions. We still haven't made a decision yet on the egg donor, but we will have to soon!
I'm going to have sign a retainer and mail it back to them, and they're going to take the money for the retainer out of the trust account we've already set up with them with our initial retainer for Growing Generations.
I also got a call from Monica at Fertility Futures who was calling on behalf of Emily to see if we had any questions. We still haven't made a decision yet on the egg donor, but we will have to soon!
Tuesday, August 03, 2004
Match Meet Scheduled
Yes! While we were on our trip to the family reunion, we got a call from Erica at Growing Generations confirming our match meet with PB and her husband. While we're Los Angeles next Friday, we've also got to meet with the insurance representative, and I've got an appointment with the fertility clinic for blood tests.
We also got a call from Emily at Fertility Futures, who recommended we have an egg donor selected by the time we meet with PB next Friday, and earlier if possible.
So, LH and I sat at the computer last night again going through profiles. We even discarded some of the ones we really liked originally. It's tough, as there's no perfect ideal candidate, since as I said earlier, none of the young ladies has a match with LH's ethnic background.
We're down to three candidates to choose from, and we're going to discuss them again tonight, and try to come up with a final tonight. It's a lot harder than I thought it would be to decide!
We also got a call from Emily at Fertility Futures, who recommended we have an egg donor selected by the time we meet with PB next Friday, and earlier if possible.
So, LH and I sat at the computer last night again going through profiles. We even discarded some of the ones we really liked originally. It's tough, as there's no perfect ideal candidate, since as I said earlier, none of the young ladies has a match with LH's ethnic background.
We're down to three candidates to choose from, and we're going to discuss them again tonight, and try to come up with a final tonight. It's a lot harder than I thought it would be to decide!
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