Beating the Clock

When we decided to have Lauren, we knew we were fighting one variable that we wouldn't have any control over, and that was time. I was already the younger of the two of us, and I wanted to have my first child before I turned 36. I didn't quite make it, having Lauren just before I turned 38. The big reason for this battle with time was partly selfish, which is the desire to be there for all the important events in her life, her graduation from high school, college, her wedding, etc.

With my partner Lars, we always knew it would be bigger fight with time as he was already 54 when we had Lauren, but I kept telling myself, plenty of other fathers were older when they had their children, and I just didn't think about it. With Lauren turning four soon, we've been having a lot more conversations with her, and I find myself overhearing conversations Lars is having with her that surprise me.

Just the other day he said to her "I'm going to be there for you up through middle school and I'll try my best to be there for high school, but honey, I might just be in the old folks home by then." I had to stop and think about it, and I realized that by the time Lauren graduated high school Lars would be over 70 years old. For both Lauren and Lars, I hope we get to beat the clock.